Epic Quotes

Was that friend Ema?

FFFFF BEST DINNER EVER! 4 quotes in 10 minutes!

Mum: Is your pork steak nice and tender or hard?
Dad: Yeah it's nice and tender
Me: .......................................................*snrk*

Dad: That's an unfortunate name... Manure!
Me: Pffff are you serious, someone's called that?
Mum: Isn't Eileen and Norman's daughter's last name Perfect?
Dad: Yeah her husband's last name is Perfect and he works at a school as a teacher. There's another teacher there called Mr Brilliant. I wonder where Manure would stand in that school?
Me: The cleaner

Dad: I once worked for a drug company that developed medicines. I was sorting out some papers and found two doctors working on the urinal tract section called Mr Leaky and Mr Smelly. True story!
Mum: Oh yeah I remember that!

Dad: I got an email the other day from someone called David Bottom

Just, your family, always.
I love it.

lol, that was an awesome dinner, NS. xD

Hahaha, I wanna come to your house for dinner.

WunderbarPhalanges wrote:Hahaha, I wanna come

Worth quoting methinks

Aunty: Mmmmm this dessert is to die for! It's better than sex!
Mum: That's not hard... hehe... that's not hard... sometimes it is

AHAHAHA
CAN YOUR FAMILY PLEASE ADOPT ME

XDDD
Can I be related to you?

Are you talking to me Wunder?
Not sure how to respond since I don't who you're talking to. Let's go with...

If yes
SURE WUNDER LET'S GET MARRIED

If no
...
I've got nothing

XD I meant NS.
BUT YES, LET'S MARRY.

Time for epic quote.

I showed Caleb's friend this Pokémon:


He said: "What the fuck is that? It's an evil broccoli monkey!"

And for this, I said, "It's the new anti-abortion campaign from the Mormon church."



Explanation: Utah is the highest consumer of green Jello.

XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD You and Caleb are hilarious

And I'd love for you both to be in my family XD

Uh, technically we're all a family here, but yeah

xD It was actually Caleb's friend.

hahaha just omfg I love it Wunder!

I missed out the word friend XD

XDDDD

Meh, he's here so much they're nearly the same.

...
BUT ARE YOU SLEEPING WITH BOTH OF THEM?

My friend on different forum: YOU AND YOUR FREAKING PASTA LINKS. Thanks a lot. /cry
I liked the Candle Cove one. At first I was like, "lulz, this isn't a story," and then everything went downhill. I will be showing up in your nightmares tonight to extract my revenge~ [He's talking about my recent obbsession with creepypasta btw]

Me: ........
The tilde made that a lot less threatening~
...
and a little more sadistically playful~
.....
I'm not sure whether to be frightened or turned on ._.

Friend: Be both. It was a total terror turn on. o.o
lulz, tilde.

Me: woooo~
Sadism, masochism, tildes, and rainbows ftw~

Him: The four principles of life~
or something.
/homework

Just
I agree
Oh my god that is wonderful

XD

Oh

Wow

O_O

TRUE STORY

Mum in the car: There's nawwwwhereee tou poooouuuuuuurk
Me: What...
Mum: There's nawhere tou pourk
Me: Who's that meant to be?
Mum: Me, there's nawhere tou pourk
Me: You're not making fun of someone?
Mum: Nawww
Me: What kind of an accent is that???
Mum: It's my occont, there's nawhere tou pourrrrrrk
Me: WHAT. ARE YOU DOING.
Mum: There's nawhere tou pourk

*Goes into house*

Dad: Hello!
Mum: There was nawwwwhere tou pourk
Dad: ...
Me: ...
Mum: Hehe